Writing Physically Different Characters
Readers want to see themselves in your books. Since people aren’t formed by cookie cutters, characters shouldn’t be either. Writing diverse characters well can be difficult. Here’s some advice about writing physical differences that I recently shared in Meg McIntyre's Facebook group Murder Mavens:
For my character, her size can't be separated from her identity because the world is built for smaller people. Thus, after her car is damaged in a hit-and-run, climbing into the cab of the tow truck for a ride back to town is a bit of a challenge, but she manages. It's a relatable scene for many fat folks.
Compare that with a book I read this weekend, in which a woman whose mother hounded her about her weight relaxed in a papasan chair several times. Even when I was essentially half my current size in college, I never sat in my friend's papasan chair for fear it would break. My experience makes me super-skeptical about the true fatness of the character.
When writing your character, you can include info in the narration that make it obvious they have a physical difference without centering the story on it.
For example, your character comes home from work, drops their keys on the table by the door, drops their prosthetic arm on the couch, and heads to their bedroom to change. They listen to voicemails on their phone while they rub lotion onto their stump (is there a better word for the remaining portion of an amputated limb?) and become caught up in the ensuing drama. Readers don't hear much else about the missing limb until the character is on their way out of the house to follow up on the phone call, and then it's only to say they grabbed the prosthetic from the couch and tucked it under their truncated limb, snagged the keys to lock the door, and headed to their car.
Personally, I'd stay away from having other folks react to the missing parts unless it's helpful for establishing plot points or character. I mean, a person walking down the street might react poorly to someone with a visible difference, but is it necessary to include a negative interaction like that in a book your audience might be reading to escape the negative aspects of real life?
If you're writing sex scenes, definitely include dialogue with a partner about the missing part(s). My uncle is deaf in one ear, so my aunt whispering sweet nothings into that ear would be wasting her energy. Some people don't want their partial limbs touched, whereas others do. Some trans men have "bonus holes." Sometimes dildos used by any gender are referred to by the analogous human part, not as a manufactured inanimate object.
[H]ire an authenticity reader, also known as a diversity, sensitivity, or cultural competency reader. Disabled people aren't monoliths, but someone similar to your character will be able to give you their feelings and reactions to the portrayal and its believability.
